Sometimes I envy people. There. I said it. I hate that I feel like that, it isn't something I'm proud of.
But these Real Life Friday talks are all about brutal honesty, and this is me being honest.
When it is the occasional handbag I can't afford, or pretty hair on a new mama who doesn't seem to have any trouble keeping it out of her child's hands (it hurts! I can't be the only one?!), it is harmless stuff I forget easily. But sometimes, it's a friend with a new job. The kind of job I would want: interesting, with great hours. And a bitter voice in my head thinks "But she doesn't even want to be in this city" or "She wasn't even looking!". And somehow, I feel entitled to judge whether she actually deserved it, or think I deserved it more.
And then I realize, if she got it, she must have deserved it.
I also realize that it is up to me to take action and try and go after the things I want.
And finally, I realize I have an amazing husband, a family that loves me, and the most perfect, healthy, little boy, and that's what really matters.
Do you feel envious sometimes?
0 comments:
Post a Comment